Ocean One Mission

Interview with self about Living in a Bubble under the Sea and Mars One:

Why have you begun to design the first permanent underwater human settlement?

Well, it’s a good question. See, I’m no scientists. I admit to my basic understanding of just about everything but I still fully believe in climate change. I see it now in the coldest Winter the United States has ever seen. I see it in the worst droughts we’ve seen in a decades. I see it in the viciousness of Hurricane Sandy and how that affected the Northeast. I see it in the horrible typhoons that have erupted all over the planet. Not to mention earthquakes caused by fracking. The earth’s crust is not happy.

Okay, so you aren’t a scientist. Why do you think you can pull this off? Why now?

I see a world in chaos. I see war and famine. The potential for our planet to be in full global war and extinction of all animals is possible due to the stupidity of humanity. I don’t see that chaos under the ocean and I don’t believe we have investigated all the possible human habitation zones. We have the technology now to do so. Underwater cities are possible. The ocean would be a great shelter from climate change. Also, if we want to come up for vacation in some stale or radioactive air we can do so. It’s just so much more doable than the Mars One mission.

Is this a spoof on Mars One? Do you not think that mission is possible?

It is a spoof and it isn’t. I don’t think Mars One is possible. I am fearful of anyone who would like to sign their life away to go to a desert planet. I don’t find that to be a sane choice and I would never want to live with anyone on a distant planet who has basically committed suicide by signing up for it.

Do you think this was at all inspired by the squirrel on Spongebob Squarepants?

Yes. It is an exact copy. I see, Sandy Cheeks, the squirrel as a true pioneer. A true scientists. She lives in an upside down aquarium under the sea. What a badass. That’s what i want to create. A perfect habitat that can be sustainable and contained.

So a cartoon inspired you? Isn’t that a bit silly?

It’s as silly as the Jetsons. People are still asking for their flying cars and no one tells them that was from a cartoon. No one tells them to stop asking. So no, it’s not silly. We still want what we see can happen in the human imagination. I find it a lot less silly than the Mars One mission.

Why do you find Mars One as impossible?

I find it to be ridiculous actually. Not just silly but absurd. I really believe it’s a scam and at the end of it it will just be a big reality TV show for the world to watch. If the people make it there the whole thing will be on cameras. They will live like lab rats before they die. If they make it that is.

You don’t think the science is possible yet?

I already said, I’m not a scientist, but no. It’s not possible because I said so but because many of the most revered scientists and astronauts have spoken out against it, saying that it is a suicide mission. I also believe that we owe it to any astronauts that we send up, to bring them back to down to their families. If folks are so willing to leave the planet without even trying to fix it or learn how to use their amazing potential as underwater dwellers then I say send them to fight foreign wars. If they don’t like it here so much, give them a rifle and have them fight ISIS or better yet create something that will help us sustain life above water.

What are your current plans for your underwater mission?

I’m at the I don’t give a fuck stage. Which I would call psychologically as batshit crazy. You won’t see any real plans. There must be an underwater cave we can start off in. Why can’t we live there? Why can’t we grow food underwater? Farm the ocean for plant life. Why do we have to go to Mars? Mars seems much less habitable than the Earth’s oceans. Life on Mars will be horrible, we’ll be continually looking for water, on Earth I’ll be living in water. If it actually happens, which it won’t, I see this as long term. Millions of years. Humans need to evolve back into sea creatures. We need to have gills. We need to befriend our mammalian sea family and learn from them. We need echolocation which we now know that humans still possess but just need to learn again.

In summary, what would you say to the world about life on our dying planet?

You haven’t seen anything yet. Get prepared. Get inventive. If you think it’s going to happen soon, you haven’t read your history, and I’m not a historian either. Life is hard headed. Humans have been through hell and back and we will continue to find ways to live on earth even with climate change. All we had was opposable thumbs and big brains and we made it this far. How far can we make it with science and technology? Don’t give up on Earth and it won’t give up on you.